On Receiving My First Hate Letter

Last Wednesday went like most days go.  School, crying, naps, Target, more crying, eating, playing, homework, more crying, etc.  We did have a nice little highlight that hasn't happened in far too long.  We had a skype date with our Rachel.

Quick catch up for those of you thinking, "who the heck is Rachel?"  Rachel is my first-cousin.  She graduated high school, didn't like her immediate option for college, so she moved from Ohio to Texas to live with us for a year and go to Midland Community College until she figured out what she wanted to do and where she wanted to be.  It was a great year.  She covered our house in hair (seriously, this girl sheds like no other) and ate all of our food.  When she left, she took a little piece of all of our hearts with her.  She's forever part of our immediate family.

Rachel is back in Ohio now.  She found a college that she loves, friends she can't live without, and is working hard to reach her dreams.  We are so proud.  We miss her like crazy.

We don't talk to her nearly enough.  Last week, we decided to fix that and set a Skype date.  After school, when things settled down and homework was done, we called.  The kids were SO excited.  They were jumping up and down and dancing to the ring tone as we were calling through.  The minute Rachel picked up, they all got stage fright and got super quiet.

Hannah was the first to decide she wanted to speak up.  Right about that time, Logan decided he wanted to yell in Rachel's face and see what she was all about (he was a month old when she moved out, his memory was a little fuzzy).  In true drama queen fashion, Hannah got upset that he stole the spotlight, threw herself on the ground and refused to look at anyone.  

We left her like that and went on about our business.  The other two Lynch kids charmed Rachel's socks off.  Logan ran around, said all of his new words, and did all of his tricks.  Camden caught her up on preschool life and drew pictures for her on the magna-doodle.  When it was just about time to hang up, I saw Hannah at our dining room table making a drawing.

Thinking she was over it, I walked over to see if she was ready for her turn to Skype with Rachel.  I got an evil look, looked down and saw a paper covered in x's.  I asked what she was drawing and she meanly said, "X's.  They are for you."

OOOOOOoooookay.  I was clearly on her s*@t list.  Without taking her eyes off of me, she wrote "MOM" and angrily drew a line through my name.  I burst out laughing.  It was hilarious.  She was mad and so mean about it, but seeing that adorable little face be so horrible was more than I could take.  I saw her eyes narrow and knew I was really going to have a devil on my hands if I didn't think of something fast.

"Hannah!  I'm only laughing to keep myself from crying.  Does that mean you don't want me to be your mom anymore?"

"Yes. I don't want any of you.  I want a new family."  By now, she had drawn all of our names with an angry line through them and a huge X over the whole bunch.

Obviously, I lost my mind and started laughing again.  It was HILARIOUS!

"I'm going to live with Rachel!"

I told her that I was very sad and sorry that she was so upset that she didn't want to be part of our family anymore.  I also told her that it wasn't an option to move away because we love her way too much to let her go.  I gave her body, still rigid with anger, a huge hug, whispered that I love her, told her I understand getting so mad you want to leave, but that I hope she changes her mind because of how much she means to us.

Ten minutes later, I got this....

Front

Back

Hopefully, she always gets over her mad so quickly.  And hopefully, I can learn to control my laugh impulse when my kids are working through a mad.

On School Mornings...UGH!

School mornings sometimes make me want to just throw my hands up in the air and head to my closet with a huge cake (not piece...the whole darn cake) and a fork.  I feel like after the cake was gone, I could walk out, head held high (with crumbs and icing all over my face), and take on the disaster that is sometimes our morning.  Don't worry Gramma and Grampa!  I'm sure they'll be perfect little angels for you on school mornings in a few weeks when Heath and I are out of town.  Don't be scared. 

They have been much better this school year so far than last.  I can let them sleep for an extra 20 minutes this year because the fight doesn't last nearly as long.  Well, until this morning.  I'm officially nervous about how the rest of the year might go.  Hopefully this morning was a fluke.

They both assured me at bedtime last night that they were ready for school and were going to hop right out of bed in the morning.  HA!  LIARS!

Camden is normally my morning person.  If she isn't up by the time I head in to wake them up, she'll quickly sit up, smile at me and get on with the morning tasks.  Hannah, on the other hand, is most decidedly NOT a morning person.  I always know it's going to be touch and go with that one.  This morning, I had two Hannahs on my hands.

I managed to get them both in an upright position and dressed.  Camden had her eyes shut the whole time.  Hannah refused to even lift an arm to help me out and kept toppling backwards onto her bed with some "I'm done with this bull crap" sighs and grunts.  Me too, Hannah, me too.

Breathe, Mom, breathe!  This will all be over in about 40 minutes.

I ushered them both, still blinking like newborns who aren't quite sure what to do with all of the light, to the bathroom.  We got their hair fixed and their morning bathroom needs taken care of without too much issue.

Right about now, Logan starts yelling from his crib and kicking the wall with both feet to let me know he's awake.  Awesome.  Let me just get the girls' breakfast started first, little man, then it's your turn.

Out to the kitchen we go.  Hannah (usually) is fully awake by now and makes a quick breakfast decision.  Camden, on the other hand, chooses this moment to get indecisive, uncooperative, and to start whining that we don't have what she wants for breakfast.  I'm starting to get impatient and more than a little irritated because of the very unhappy noises coming out of the baby boy room, and I just want her to make a decision so I can go get the baby situation taken care of.  We all know what you are going to pick, Camden, so just pick it!  That's what my head is screaming.  My outer mother is very calmly giving her options, even though I could already have what I know she is going to pick ready and on the table.  Give her time, Mom, she's still very little (I have to constantly talk myself off of freak out ledges in the morning). Almost every morning Hannah wants a bagel with butter and Camden wants a bagel with cream cheese.  Hannah's breakfast is taken care of when Camden finally decides on her (surprise) cream cheese bagel.  Done!

As soon as they are at the table eating, it's off to get little man.  I catch him mid-scream.  The minute he hears the door creak open, he stops, giggles, jumps on his mattress a few times, and raises his arms so I can get him out of the crib.  The easy part is over, though, because now it's time to change that diaper and dress him. Changing his morning diaper should be an Olympic event.  He laughs through me getting his sleeper off, but the minute that diaper comes off, he goes stiff as a board and starts crying like I have him chained to the wall and am beating him with a 2 by 4 full of rusty old nails.  I thought the girls were the dramatic ones!  Once the clean diaper is on, he spends his getting dressed time throwing every article of clothing he possibly can onto the floor.  He thinks he's hilarious!

Mid-diaper change, it never fails that Camden will come in fussing that she changed her mind and doesn't want her cream cheese bagel afterall.  Can she have chex mix?  Goldfish?  Cookies?  Spaghetti for breakfast instead?  Yes, Camden you can have all of those things.  When you are an adult living on your own and I'm not there to force you to eat something a little more breakfast worthy.  NO!  Get back to the table and eat your bagel. That was your choice, now you need to eat it or go to school hungry.  I'm elbows deep in changing a diaper and I. CANNOT. HELP. YOU. for at least another 5 minutes.  Just go eat!!!!  Please!!!

By the time teeth are brushed, shoes and coats are on, and we are packed up ready to go, I'm thankful that I'm giving them to someone else for the day.  That morning 40 minutes is the longest 40 minutes of my day.

Want to know how I know I'm insane?  I start missing those little stink pots the minute I pull out of the school parking lot.  I have cried pulling away from the school more times this year than ever before because the minute I get in the car, do a little happy to be free dance, and breathe a sigh of relief, I start missing them with an ache that goes all the way to my toes.  Yes, I still get Logan all day, but he misses them, too!  He wanders the house looking for them, which makes me miss them even more.

They are growing up way too fast on me.  Pretty soon, they won't need me there to drag them out of bed (well, OK, maybe that part will always be my job), but they won't need me to dress them, do their hair, get them breakfast, and try to love them through a morning they aren't quite ready to be awake for yet.  They'll want to take the bus to school because having your Mom drop you off and pick you up isn't quite as cool as it should be.  Pretty soon, they won't need me in quite the way they need me now.  So, I'm going to do my best to enjoy these mornings and to hug them through the "tough" times that every morning brings.  They are happy enough by the time we head out the door.  I like to think that I'm part of what turns their morning around.  My fingers are crossed that they will always need me to help get their mornings on track, but deep down I know that eventually they will be able to do that on their own.

On Remembering Important Things

We are in a very popular wedding season right now.  I feel like I have people on Facebook giving a shout out to their significant other for a wedding anniversary every single time I log in right now.  In fact, I was doing that same thing just a few weeks ago (9 years...whoop...whoop). It makes me smile every single time.  In a day when divorce is so very common, I can't come up with more than maybe two friends who have had to go down that awful road.  And the ones who have, have come out renewed and have married again...in a lasting way.  I see year after year, commitment after commitment, of people having found their soul mates.  It warms the heart.  It really does. I pray that we all keep fighting for our marriages and our loves just like we are doing now.  9 years, 10 years, 35 years, and beyond.

The part that leaves me scratching my head is when I see a post saying something to the effect of "14 years ago on this day at this very second, our eyes met across the room and that was the beginning of the end for us.  We have been together ever since that very second" or "Our first date happened on this day 7 years ago."  Say, what?!?  You really remember that?  I can remember that Heath and I had our first date at Applebees (12 years ago?  Or 13?).  I remember some of what we talked about.  I think it might have been in the fall(?)  Maybe.  I remember a few girls from my dorm floor stopping us and going on and on about how cute it was that the two of us had just gone on our first date and how great we were together.  Whoa!  Slow down, OK!?

I should interject and say right here that I am terrible with numbers.  I forget almost immediately what the date is when I wake up in the morning.  I can always tell you what day of the week it is, what happened that day, and how I felt, but the actual date...flies right out the window!!!  Today is August 29th, right?  Checked the calendar.  Literally, just stopped and did this to reassure myself on the date.  It's the 28th!!!!!  FAIL!

Back to wedding anniversaries.  Want to know why I'll never forget my wedding date?  Because even if I tried, it's engraved on the inside of my wedding band...BOOM!  Anyhow, we have a hard time buying for anniversaries.  We even look up the "appropriate" wedding gifts for each year.  I just looked this up recently, but I couldn't tell you what the gift for year 9 might be.  Modern day gift...I want to say leather?!  HUH!?!  Here you go, Heath!  Some fancy pants just for you!!!  NOT!  

Anyway, a few days before our anniversary, Heath looks at me with a twinkle in his eye and tells me that he was asking around for ideas at work.  One of the ladies (OK, the only lady in the office...love you, Mary) told him that she's heard about men buying watches and setting the time to the exact time they got married years before.  Heath looked at me and grinned (I love his grin) and very confidently told me we got married at around 11 in the morning.  I burst out laughing!  I was full of superiority!  It definitely wasn't in the morning.  It was around 2 in the afternoon.  Right?  Or, wait!!!  It was definitely on the 30 minute mark.  You should always get married on the upswing of the hour.  That's a thing, right?  So, was it 1:30 or 2:30?  I still haven't checked the wedding invitation because I'm almost postive it was 2:30 and I don't want to burst my own bubble.  That sounds right.  Or was it?  SEE!!!  I can't even remember the exact time of the start of the most important moment of my life!!!

Know what I remember?  Waking up at 5 in the morning so full of excitement that I couldn't get back to sleep.  I remember waking up one of my bridesmaids at 6 because I didn't want to be alone watching Saved By the Bell on the biggest day of my life!  Kati, you are the best!  You didn't need the sleep, right?  I remember all of the prep work.  I remember when it was time for the rest of my life to start.  I remember looking at my Dad full of nerves wondering if I was going to cry my way through this ceremony and telling him he was absolutely not to cry or I WOULD LOSE IT!  Know what he did?  The best thing he ever possibly could have done.  He looked at me and smiled and told me that I had always had a level head and made good decisions and that he had no doubt that I had made a good decision this time. I remember this huge weight lifting off of my shoulders.  I remember those huge doors opening to a crowd (a pretty big one) of faces smiling at me.  Faces that had loved me and Heath from the very beginning.  Some faces that had never met me before, but were still smiling at me because I was the one Heath chose.  And then I found his face.  My favorite face.  My husband's face.  I cried at every wedding before mine and every wedding after mine, but I didn't cry at my own.  I felt peace.  I felt love.  I felt like it was 100% right.  I don't remember the time, but I do remember every detail of how I felt that day.

I also can't tell you the date of the day we got engaged.  It was June-ish of 2004 (bonus points for getting the year).  He was leaving to move to Houston, Texas.  I was staying in Ohio.  I was pretty sure if he left without putting a ring on my finger, that would be the end of the best thing I had ever known.  Guys.  He put a ring on it.  Very late at night.  On the last night before he left.  At the house I grew up in.  My mom was sleeping.  My Dad and brothers were watching a movie.  I was in my pj's and headed to bed.  Heath followed me up to my room to say good-night, got down on his knee in the pitch black and asked me to do him the honor of being his wife.  It was perfect.  I remember every detail...except the date!!!!  OOPS!!!

I wish I had a mind for numbers.  I'm probably (hopefully) never going to forget the actual birthdate of any member of my family.  The other numbers might go (and more quickly than I'm anticipating) with time.  Hannah is only five and I still have to stop and really think about what time she was born (4:41 pm, thank you very much).  I can give you the time and her weight, but her length is already gone.  I'm sure the other numbers will be gone soon, too.  Luckily, I wrote them down.  I can tell you exactly how I felt, though.  I remember every gory, beautiful detail.  I remember crying in wonder.  I didn't have the most fun pregnancy.  I literally threw up every day through the whole 9 months.  I was miserable.  I remember looking at Heath before they had even cleaned Hannah up and brought her back to me and telling him that I would absolutely do it all over again.  Because of the love I felt that day.  In that moment.  And every moment after.  

Guess what?  I did it again.  2 more times.  I threw up basically the whole pregnancy with the next 2 as well.  Stinkers.  Camden and Logan are going to throw me for a loop.  One was born at 12:06 pm (Logan) and one was born at 12:17 pm (Camden).  I can tell you now who is who, but in a few years, I will probably forget.  However, I guarantee I will always be able to tell you how I felt with each baby.  (Side note.  I just put Logan down for a nap and have a poster up with all his birth stats in his room.  He was born at 12:07.  Dang it!!!!  Now I need to go back and check Camden's time.  Oops again!  Camden was actually born at 12:16.  I was close!  Don't feel too bad for my kids)!

I have had 4 best days of my life so far.  I can tell you the dates (so far) and the times (sort of...close enough), and I can guarantee I can tell you exactly how I felt, even as the numbers start to fade.  I wish I had a mind for numbers.  I have no doubt that those of you with minds for numbers who can remember dates AND times can also remember the feeling.  For me, I'll just have to stick with the feeling...and general date.  Any of you want to remember the exact dates and times for me, too!?!

Isn't life amazing, you guys?  Soak in every single major (and minor) detail.  Whether you remember details (like dates...I'm just jealous of those of you who can) or not, I guarantee you will always remember the feelings.  What a blessing!

On Finding Family No Matter Where You Are.

We have moved 2 times in the 5 years since we had our first child in 2009.  The moves took us places where we did not know a soul.  Do you know how daunting it is to move to a place where there is not so much as a friendly face in your line of vision?  Actually, I bet a lot of you do!

I've done this 3 times in the course of a life that I thought would never take me more than 20 minutes from my parents, my family, my home.  One was before kids.  I think it was actually harder before kids.  Lucky for me, God threw Heath's Aunt and Uncle in my path.  Literally.  They lived 15 minutes away and saw that I needed someone to have my back.  They refused to give up on me.  They saved my sanity and helped me learn how to really pull myself up by the bootstraps and to "put on my big girl panties", right Laverne!?!  

Six months after they started their part in loving me through it all, we met the best friends we could have ever asked for.  I still call Kristin any time I really need an ear that understands what I'm going through because she knows better than almost anyone what I've been through before, so she knows how to deal with what I'm going through now.  That's a best friend!  We "grew up" in our marriages together.  We had babies together.  They are some of the best family we got to handpick as our own.  Someday, Kristin and Jeremy, we will live close again!

After leaving them, I think the only reason that I haven't ended up a crying puddle of goo that can't move from the floor is because I now have 3 little souls to take care of, lead, teach, and put before any self-centered indulgence I might have.  No matter how huge that pull to cry in a closet for days on end might be, I cannot do it.  Who would get my babies to school, feed them, care for them, make them dinner, love on them like I do?  Honestly, if I lost it, no one could take my place.  I'm not saying that to be egocentric, full of myself, or prideful. I am their mother.  There is literally no one else who can take my place.  I have a job, duty, full-hearted desire to be there.  Be present.  Be their rock even if I can't be my own.  Be everything for them that I want them to be.  They are learning from me, so I'll fake it until I make it if I have to.

Moving without kids was hard enough, but that need for a kindered spirit intensifies a million times when you have little ones to take care of.  Finding someone who can identify one hundered percent with the anxiety you have about raising another human being in a way that makes them a caring, loving, productive member of society helps ease the burden.  It's the biggest job anyone can ever have.  Being a parent.  Doing it without a support group is incredibly scary, daunting, overwhelming.

You know how I know God exists and loves me (aside from all of the blessings I have in front of my face daily)?  Because every single time we have moved and been isolated and on our own, He has given us faces full of love, caring, understanding, immediate acceptance.  Faces who have taken up a part of our hearts and become family.

I have wonderful parents.  I would give anything to be closer to "home" to see them daily.  To see my brothers and in-laws daily.  To watch our nieces and nephews grow and learn.  To hug on them every single day.  Until that is a possibility, we fully embrace the people who take us in, love us, accept us, enjoy us, and make us feel like we have a home away from home.

I would love to list you all from day one.  I hope and pray you know who you are, even without your name written here for all to see.  From grade school right on up.  Right now, I am incredibly thankful for the Archuleta family, for the connection I've made with Veronica and her kids (and yes, Jarrod, you too, even though we've only gotten our families together a time or two), to Diana (who is going through something far harder than I could ever imagine), for the Santa Fe family we weren't sure we would have, but were surprised to find so quickly.

Ohio/West Virginia people you know who you are!  Midland people...you know who you are!  I could go on and on about Midland people.  You all might be a whole different blog post.  Friendswood people.  Grade school, high school, college people...I think/hope you know who you are.  

Huge win finding people to love everywhere we go.  I have a list of people who I have fallen completely in love with everywhere we have lived.  As hard as moving so often can be, I am grateful because you are part of my life.  I'll carry you in my heart forever.  It doesn't matter if we talk daily, weekly, monthly, yearly, you mean more to us than words can say.  

On Brushing Kid Teeth

Here are my deep and very controversial opinions on...kid teeth.  How simple, yet how incredibly difficult it can be sometimes.

Hannah was put completely under anesthesia at age 3 to have some issues with her teeth taken care of.  She had 6 caps and several other tooth-colored fillings done.  IT.  WAS.  AWFUL.

I'll never forget the devastation and incredible guilt I felt when we found out exactly what was going on in her mouth.  It was a huge blow.  We brushed twice a day.  We let her do it on her own in the morning and we would make sure she had a thorough night brushing.  She has never had excessive amounts of sugar (although, the girl does love cake and cookies...she is mine after all)!   We thought we were doing it right and were on top of things.  Apparently, we were wrong.

The dentist we saw was incredibly comforting.  He assured us this was probably nothing we could have prevented.  She has super soft baby teeth and according to him, it was bound to happen.  Several of his own kids had the same issue.

Still.  There was that guilt.

Especially on the day she got everything corrected.

We walked in to the office first thing in the morning.  Since she was so young, she was first on the list.  The anesthesiologist came out, gave her a shot that was supposed to knock her completely loopy and sat with us for about 10 minutes.  Hannah was still begging to go home and seemed aware, but at the same time was completely out of it.  Like she was a more than drunk 18-year-old at their first college party.  That was terrifying for a me to see as a parent.  I was starting to panic watching her unsual behavior and inability to focus.  It was very unnerving.

He asked if I wanted him to give her more because he had never seen a kid fight it like Hannah was fighting it.  I immediately told him NO and to take her back to see how it went.  Turns out, even though she was answering our questions and forming complete thoughts, she was definitely out of it.  He didn't bring her back to me, but got her all the way under without a fight.

It took them over an hour to correct everything.  When it was over, they wanted me to be the only one with her as she woke up to make it "easier".  I spent 20 minutes in a room alone with her wrestling to keep her safe as she very angrily came out of her anesthesia.  Anyone ever fought to hold and keep a 40-lb kid safe as they came out of anesthesia?  It was not fun.  I was also 8 weeks pregnant with Logan at the time and was terrified that she was going to (very unintentionally) kick me right in the stomach. Luckily, we all came out unharmed, but completley exhausted.  They sent us home before she could even stand up on her own.

We always tell her how lucky she is to have special shiny teeth.  Parenthood lie number...I'm not even sure what number this was.  It's not a big deal and we didn't want her to feel different, so we tried to make it seem fun.  She didn't really buy it.

It was a rough afternoon.  Hours later, she tried to walk for the first time.  It was very unsuccessful.  I had to hold her under the armpits to keep her on her feet.  She finally came out of it, but I vowed to never see one of my kids look like that for teeth again.

The next month was a nightmare of her screaming in pain every time we brushed.  The toothbrush came out bloody every time.  We saw 3 different dentists.  It was the third dentist who (while still not locating the problem) sat us down and showed us how to properly brush.  This didn't fix the problem (as she had cement from her work left in her mouth at the gum line causing the irritation...we found this out 2 months later at a routine dentist visit), but it did help with the pain and bleeding.

He showed me how to lay her head down in my lap to have the best view of all of her teeth.

It's also super easy to pull the cheeks gently back to really get a good angle on those back teeth from here, which I couldn't do successfully here since I don't have a third hand to hold the camera.

He explained that scrubbing with the toothbrush did nothing but spread the food around.  He showed how to do VERY gentle circles to get the food out because that is what the brushes were designed for.  We had a happy camper again!  Seriously!  No pressure needed on those sweet little teeth!  I always thought that was the way to get teeth squeeky clean. I was wrong!

Love this sweet smile!

She also has a very sensitive gag reflex.  Telling her to open her mouth as wide as she can while I get those back teeth has alleviated this particular problem.  We still implement this method for brushing those pesky molars.

We sing songs as we brush, as well.  That makes her more involved in the nightly brushing and helps time go faster.

She is in charge of her own morning brushing.  She does a great job and accepts guidance without a fight.  She's a pretty awesome little lady!

Sometimes you are just born with good teeth genes.  Hannah happened to not be.  I hadn't gone to the dentist in an embarrassing number of months (Ok, fine. Years.) and neither had Heath.  After we moved to Santa Fe, we decided it was time for us to get on the tooth exam train that we forced the kids to be on.  I literally flossed the day I went to the dentist...for the first time in several years.  Heath had been flossing every day for a long time.  The denist told him to floss daily since he clearly wasn't doing that.  I was told to keep up whatever I was doing because my teeth were in great shape and had obviously been flossed regularly.  I was happy.  Heath....not so much.

Win on happy teeth genes.  Fail on realizing my kids might not be so lucky!  Now I know, though!  The other two Lynch babies have passed their dental exams with flying colors...so far.

On Our Happily Ever After

9 years ago today, at 2:30 in the afternoon, the ceremony that would define the rest of our lives began.  One of the coolest moments was that on a perfectly clear day, there was a huge clap of thunder the second we kissed and sealed the deal.  There was a short little rain shower and then the rest of the day was sunny and beautiful.

We actually missed that happening, but had quite a few people tell us about it at the reception.  On our way to our hotel that night, we laughed about it and wondered if God was happy and clapping or if He was thundering mad about us being married.

9 years later, I think it's safe to say He was happily clapping.

So, here are my thoughts on marriage.

1.  Marry your best friend.  Marry the person you can't wait to talk to at the end of the day.  The person you want to immediately share every joy, struggle and sorrow with.

2.  Laugh together as often as possible.  We joke around with each other all of the time.  Sometimes people don't know how to take us.  They can't tell if we are having a great time or are about to rip each other's heads off.  It's fun for us to make people uncomfortable.  Sorry people!

3.  It's going to get rough sometimes, but don't stop fighting for each other.  We are (hopefully) on the other side of a rough patch.  Luckily for us, it only lasts a few days and then all is forgiven and forgotten.

4.  Forgive and forget.  The forgive part is easy.  The forget part, not so much.  The only person you are hurting by hanging on to anger and resentment is yourself.  We are all human and make mistakes.  Give your spouse the same grace you want them to give you.

5.  Try not to fight.  Some of you who thrive on conflict are laughing right now.  We don't happen to be aggressive people.  I personally hate conflict.  I can probably count on one hand the number of times that we've had actual fights.  That being said...

6.  It's OK to get irritated and upset.  Just make sure you talk about it.  It took us several years to get to the point where we could be completely honest about how we were feeling.  We didn't want to hurt each other's feelings or make the other person feel unloved.  We have a lot more trust now that we are completely honest and open.  We know we are safe coming to each other about not so pleasant things because we know we will still love each other once it's been said.

7.  Try to put each other first.  I know in the craziness of life, especially for those of us with kids, it can be really hard.  They don't have to be big things, though, guys.  Make them their favorite meal.  Help them clean up something that you don't normally take responsibility for.  I love taking Heath Starbucks when he's been at work for a few hours and I have some free time.  It's an easy thing for me to do that let's him know I'm thinking about him and appreciate the hard work he does for our family.

8.  Hug and touch each other.  Heath can't walk by me without smacking me on the booty.  It makes me laugh every time.  I told him once that I'll know something is wrong in our relationship when he walks by and doesn't give me my love smack.  I like to get in his way and hug him when he's in the middle of something.  One because it irritates him in a "I'm going to roll my eyes, but would really miss this if you stopped" kind of way.  Two because I just can't help it.  Sometimes I just really need to hug him.

9.  Be selfless, not selfish.  One of the biggest things that we do that helps when things get tough is to take a step back and look at things from each other's perspective.  As humans, it's very easy to get wrapped up in our own needs and wants, but it is important to see things from the other side.

10.  Just love each other.  

We are by no means experts on marriage and love, but whatever we are doing is working...so far.  I love that man more and more every year, day, minute that passes.  So, Heath Lynch, just remember that I love you with all my heart and will for all of our days.  I meant what I said when we took our vows.  You are everything...until death do us part...and beyond.

On Back to School

Just a few short months ago, I was wondering what on Earth I was going to come up with to keep us busy all summer.  I was sure it was going to crawl by.  Guess what?  It FLEW.  The girls had orientation today and school starts for real tomorrow.  What?!?  Where the heck did summer go?

We had big plans to hit a water park, go to the zoo, go to the Children's Museum, Library, and play at the park every day.  We did almost none of these things.  The days flew right on by!  We did make it to the park about once a week.  We went to a water park when we were on vacation.  We made it to the library once, too.  The girls each had gymnastics once a week.  That was it...all summer.  Most days, we were happy right here just enjoying our yard and all of the fun toys we have in this house.

Looking back on summers growing up, we didn't rush from one thing to the next.  Our days weren't planned full of activities, yet we still had a great time.  I have wonderful memories of playing outside, reading all day, playing goofy games with my brothers, and spending time at the pool.  We didn't rush from place to place and thing to thing to fill the hours.  We just enjoyed the time relaxing at home.

Last week as we rushed through store after store filling the school supply lists and stocking up on uniforms, I was ready for the craziness of having three kids at home all of the time to end.  I have been looking foward to back to school more than I should.  I'm ready for a minute to sit and breathe and not be constantly filling kid needs.  Having just Logan here is going to feel like vacation.

I feel a little guilty and selfish saying that, but it's true.  My patience level is going to jump tremendously starting tomorrow.  I won't be nearly as tired at the end of the day.  I'll have a little time just for me again.

I sat down last night to plan out what I'm going to do with my new found freedom.  I'm going to finally get this house all the way clean all at one time.  I'm going to sit in the silence while Logan naps and read.  I'm going to eat lunch before my food gets cold.  I'm going to play just with Logan.  I'm going to get in a routine of working out.  And then I ran out of ideas and realized what I'm going to miss even more than a quiet, clean house.

I'm going to miss the girls.  I'm going to want to do puzzles and hug them in the middle of the day.  I'm going to drink chocolate milk in the afternoon and wish they were here drinking some with me.  I'm going to plan their favorite meals for dinner so that they know I was thinking about them all day.  I'm going to get bored during Logan's nap.

As much as I'm looking forward to the freedom that sending them to school grants me, I'm sure going to miss their laughter and their sweet little smiles during the day.

I'm conflicted today, guys.  I am very much ready for school to start for selfish reasons, but for some different selfish reasons, I'm not at all ready for school to start.

So, for the rest of today, I'm going to make my last weekday with all of my kids count.  And when tomorrow hits, and I only have one little sweetie here with me for most of the day, I'm going to fill the time with things I've been longing to do all summer.  I'm sure going to enjoy this first week with the girls at school, but I'm going to be more than ready to have them back with me all day Saturday.